Tuesday, September 20, 2016

The Ten Commandments of Retirement

I know my blog seems like self promotion much of the time, because I am always showing pictures from my childhood, pictures of myself in "get ups (as my mother used to say)" and talking about my life.

 
 


But I always hoped that people realized I was making fun of myself as much as I was making fun of what I was talking about (well, I made fun of Hubby, too, but he's used to it), and that, though much of what I wrote about was tongue-in-cheek, I was also trying to inspire women like myself, impart information about what it's like to be a "woman of a certain age" and to just have some fun with where I was in my life. I was also hoping that Oprah would discover this blog and pull me out of obscurity. Unfortunately, that never happened, but, believe it or not, there were actually people out there who said they enjoyed my pictures and what I had to say.

Before I get into today's topic, I want to say that I have been wrestling with whether or not I should keep pushing myself to publish a Tuesday post. 

If you are a regular reader, you know I publish my movie and book reviews every Friday, but I reserve Tuesday for my "rants," as I call them, but which are really my take on what's going on in my world as a "woman of a certain age" and the world around me. I reminisce, bitch and try to inspire, while also trying to be humorous, but I am thinking that perhaps I don't have that much to say every single week.  If you asked Hubby he would most certainly say I have much to say EVERY DAY, but I want to write things that are at least fresh and funny, if not important. 

In my Tuesday blog post, I have tried to inspire women of a certain age to not give up because they have accumulated a few pounds and a few wrinkles and to let them know they are not alone in their retirement and aging struggles.  I also hoped to help the younger generation understand such people - we retired women of a certain age - and also to be funny, to inform, to get a conversation going, to make you think...but I have also stressed myself out about meeting my self-imposed deadlines.  Even when I went on vacation, I would work extra hours beforehand to have some posts ready to make sure I would publish on my regular schedule so I wouldn't disappoint my regular readers, even if I was in Victoria, B.C. or Timbuktu (I actually have never been to Timbuktu but it made me sound cool, right?). 

In the last three years since I have retired I have published 342 posts - two per week without fail - and there have been over 100,000 page views, though I would sure like to say 1,000,000 page views. 

I started writing this blog a little over three years ago, right before I retired, as an antidote to my fears and anxieties about retirementOne week in, I was losing my mind a little bit and even started wondering whether dogs ever retired or what it would be like to be a retired Real Housewife.  But once I started feeling comfortable, I started sharing what I had learned about myself in retirement in the hope that it would help others who were struggling. About one year in, I finally got it - The joy of retirement - and just recently, I found the ultimate "key" to a happy retirement.  

Likewise, since I was a librarian for over 40 years, I enjoyed talking about libraries and librarians and trying to smash the myths around them with "Why I Love My Library," "Why We Need Librarians," "Interview with a Librarian" and "Things Librarians Hate." Then my blog sort of morphed into my thoughts on aging and what was going on around me and a way to review my life, past and present with an emphasis on TV, my love of pop culture, my trips and activities and my pet peeves, which I called my "rants."

But now I am no longer struggling with retirement (I LOVE it!). I  think I have come a long way and I have certainly documented all of that in my blog over the last three years, so I think I have probably said everything I need to say about what I have learned.  Likewise, about libraries and librarians.  And getting older?  I think I've beaten that horse too. I also think I have exhausted my views on TV, Kim Kardashian and other pop culture topics and ranted my little head off about most of the things that bug me. I even shared my colonoscopy and my menopause, so if I would go there, you can tell I was already stretching my search for topics a couple of years ago! Though, I will say, if you are going to have a colonoscopy, you might want to read that one!   It's funny, if I do say so myself.

I have also tackled a wide variety of other topics:


And those are just a small percentage of the posts I have written over the last three years (and if you are interested in others, there is an archive on the right side of this blog that goes back to the very beginning).

But you can see I have a wide range of interests that I wanted to share, and I shared every Tuesday no matter what.

However, that dedication is starting to take its toll, especially since all of that extra work hasn't resulted in Oprah discovering me which is disappointing.  Even my adult children rarely comment or share my posts. I also find myself writing blog posts in my mind lying in bed at night and when I wake up in the morning.  It has become a lot of pressure and I'm retired.  I'm not supposed to be under pressure anymore!  So I am thinking it is time to re-evaluate. 

So that I don't show signs of dementia and start repeating myself, I think it's probably time to take a breather on Tuesdays and concentrate on my Friday movie and book reviews with the occasional restaurant and concert/theatre review thrown in. 

Now, those of you who are my fans, and I so thank you for your support, that doesn't mean I am done with my editorializing. 

It just means that I might not publish one of my rants every single Tuesday, but when I feel inspired I still will.  Because you see, I really feel that one of my purposes in life is to communicate.  I need to do it and feel that sometimes at least I do it well.  So it's not the end of me, just a regrouping.  So please don't forget about me.  And as the classic C & W song says, "How Can I Miss You if You Won't Go Away?" 

So I am going to go away for awhile and hopefully you will miss me.

(And if you are unfamiliar with the song, here it is.  I always aim to be helpful).







As I said, I will definitely continue to write my movie and book reviews and try to see all 1001 movies I am supposed to see before I die and report back.  I always wanted to be a movie critic and I don't think there are many of those who speak from, shall we say, a mature point of view - and with a sense of humor - so that fulfills one desire, but the other one is...I don't really have anyone to talk movies with. 

Remember when we were young and would go to the movies to see the latest Antonioni or Bunuel and when it was over go to a bar and emphatically talk about the film?  I don't have that.  Hubby and I watch movies together, but he's a guy and once he says, "That was good," it's over.  So in writing my reviews I was hoping to get responses, and though some of you do respond when I post my blog on FB, I haven't really gotten any community together or a conversation going via my blog. Maybe blogging has become passe and everyone has moved on to vlogging or some other bit of social media. But I am still hoping and you can still find me on IMDB and on my site on Fridays.

Anyway, thank you everyone for your support and I hope you will still look for Rosy the Reviewer on my site on Tuesdays as well as Fridays, even though there might not be a new post every Tuesday anymore.  But I will still be posting my rants, just not every week. But on Friday, you can still expect to see my trenchant, pithy and sometimes humorous movie and book reviews in Rosy the Reviewer's inimitable style!

Now as a sort of farewell and so you won't miss me too much (but remember, this isn't really goodbye) on to a Tuesday rant.

I have been retired now for over three years and though the first year and a half was a bit rocky, I think I have come out of the early retirement shadows and seen the light.

If you compare some of my early posts to recent posts, you can easily see that.  But now I think putting all of that together, I can condense them all down into ten easy "commandments" that I hope will be helpful to the struggling newly retired and those who are uneasily contemplating it.


The Ten Commandments of Retirement

 

1. Thou shalt no longer have a boss or, if thy can manage it, a landlord, and thou shalt be happy about that.

We are grown-ups.  Who wants someone telling us what we can and cannot do, right? You now no longer have to do anything you don't want to do. So if you are mourning the loss of your job, think about it like that.  And if you are mourning the loss of your job so much that you are thinking about getting another job, don't!  Give it time.  You will come to enjoy your own company.


2. Thou shalt not get up until at least 9:30 (or thou wilt give the rest of us retirees a bad name).


3. Thou shalt not feel guilty about what thee watches on TV or what thee read-ith or what thee enjoy-ith.

There are snobs and haters out there who are meant to bringeth you down but they are probably not retired and pissed off about it. Thou have earned thy guilty pleasures so don't feel guilty.

 
4. Thou shalt not worry about meaning in thy life now that you are retired, because thy existence is meaning enough. No matter how oldeth you geteth you will always be YOU, that same person you have always been and think you are when you aren't looking in the mirror.

 
 
5. Thou shalt enjoy thyself and not feel guilty about doing whatever the hell you want. 

Do what you love.  It's never too late to be a rock star!




6. Thou shalt have wine or champs for lunch if thy wish it.

Why not?  It's not like you have to go back to work or anything, right?



 
 
8. Thou shalt always have a sense of humor about thyself!


 

 


8. Thou shalt not look old or act old.

Thou shalt stay connected, get out in the world, look trendy, wear make-up and get up front at rock concerts!


And if your find yourself reaching for the Ben Gay, counting out every penny from your coin purse at the grocery store and holding up the line or, worse, going to the store in your pajamas, read "How Not to Look Old" and "How Not to Act Old" for inspiration.



9. Thou shalt loveth thy grandchildren with all thy might.


Even if they live far, far away. 
(I tackled that issue in "Parenting and Grandparenting from a Distance.")
 

10. Thou shalt never give up or go "gentle into that good night," though you might take a break from time to time.

And that's what I am going to do.



But I will still publish my reviews on Fridays and for my "rants," please check in from time to time on a Tuesday or come see me at my Rosy the Reviewer Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/rosythereviewer/



Thanks for Reading!
 
See you Friday
 

for my review of


"Sully"
 
and 
  
The Week in Reviews
(What to See or Read and What to Avoid)

   
and the latest on



"My 1001 Movies I Must See Before  
 I Die Project."
 

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2 comments :

  1. I love your blog and have learned so much about retirement from you. But I certainly understand where you're coming from when you wonder if you have anything new to say, or if you are repeating yourself, or if this self-imposed deadline is worth it. You have a stick-with-it-ness that is admirable. But in case you are looking for anyone else to weigh in on this "Blog or not to blog" dilemma I will paraphrase your wise counsel to me: "I free-eth you from the pressures of your blog!" BTW - I do not view your Tuesday posts as rants...they are public service announcements. They make me laugh and nod my head and help me realize I am not alone. While I don't see/read as many of the movies or books that you review as I would like...I can always relate to your Tuesday posts. But since you will still write occasionally, you are not going away....so I won't miss you! I'll just highly anticipate the next installment.

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    Replies
    1. Thanks, Susan. I appreciate your comments and don't worry. I will still be around. I am already working on a "Tuesday post." I just wanted to give a heads up to my readers that I might not have new content every Tuesday.

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