Showing posts with label book reviews. Show all posts
Showing posts with label book reviews. Show all posts

Friday, September 29, 2017

"mother!" and The Week in Reviews

[I review the new movie "Mother!" as well as DVDs "How To Be A Latin Lover" and "My Cousin Rachel."  The Book of the Week is "The Smitten Kitchen Cookbook."  I also bring you up-to-date with "My 1001 Movies I Must See Before I Die Project" with "Delicatessen."]




Mother!


A poet and his much younger wife live a seemingly idyllic life until uninvited guests arrive -- and then they won't leave!

This is one of those movies that you need to mull over until it hits you, but while you are watching, it is excruciating.  There is a lot going on here, and even though I found the experience difficult, it must have affected me, because when I stepped out of the movie theatre into the mall teeming with people, I didn't have good feelings about my fellow human beings, and from the looks of this movie, written and directed by Darren Aronofsky, he doesn't either.

Basically, the story is about a young woman (Jennifer Lawrence) and her husband (Javier Bardem) living in an old house.  They are childless and the woman is working to restore the house that had been partially destroyed by a fire. One night, a man (Ed Harris) shows up at their door explaining that he is there because he was told that the house is a bed and breakfast. However, it turns out he is there because he is a fan of the poet's writings. The husband invites the man into the house much to the unease of his wife.  Then the man's wife (Michelle Pfeiffer) arrives, then their sons arrive.  Soon the man and his wife become involved in a drama with their sons where one of the sons is killed. Now the the young wife married to the poet is not just uneasy, she is horrified. 

(You might notice that I am not mentioning any given names here and the reason is that there aren't any.  Neither the husband nor the wife are named. The wife is listed as "Mother," the husband as "Him," the uninvited guests as "Man" and "Woman.")

Anyway, people keep arriving and things get out of hand, items in the house are broken, "Mother" starts going nuts and has a final meltdown that reminded me of the ending of "Carrie."

The film is obviously an allegory (it's usually some kind of symbolic allegory when the characters are named "Mother," "Him," "Man" and "Woman"), but what it all adds up to in the end is anyone's guess.

The biblical and symbolic references aside - I mean, there is God, there is Cain and Abel, there is the Eucharist, there is Mother Earth...anyway, I think that's what was going on...on a purely superficial level this is my idea of a horror film - uninvited guests who won't leave. Right?  I would find that to be a horrific experience.  

But on a larger scale, I think Aronofsky thinks that if we keep repeating history, the end of the world is nigh.

Don't mess with Mother Nature!

But there is also all kinds of other stuff going on in this film. 

Aronofsky also seems to be saying that we humans worship love, but we don't practice it; we search to find in others what we ourselves lack; and that there is a price to fame and celebrity.  He also comments on the relationship between men and women, how difficult it can be to create both artistically and physically and the sad political state of the world. This film is A LOT.  It's also about a really bad husband. He was not supportive.  If I had been "Mother," I would have kicked all of those people out of the house and him as well!

There is also homage to horror films.  I already mentioned "Carrie," but this film also had a bit of "Rosemary's Baby" and "Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf," "Woolf" being, in my opinion, a horror story about marriage.

Written and directed by Aronofsky who gave us the nightmarish but much more accessible "Black Swan," this is a very personal work that includes casting Jennifer Lawrence. You can tell Aronofsky and Lawrence have a relationship because the camera is up close and personal on her at all times.  And her relationship with Aronofsky is the only reason I can figure out why Lawrence wanted to play that character. I don't think this role did her any good. Though she is the center of the film, her character mostly reacts to what is going on around her. She runs around the crumbling house looking wide-eyed and worried, then upset and frantic and that's about it.  It's Pfeiffer and Harris who steal the show.

What Aronofsky was trying to do here isn't entirely clear, and I still haven't gotten over the rather pretentious title.  I mean a lower case title with an exclamation point? But I have to give him credit for trying to make a film that tries to say something.  Unfortunately, my problem was that I wasn't sure what that something was.

Rosy the Reviewer says...probably one of the most controversial films of the year.  Whether you like the film or not, it will certainly spark conversation. 




***Some Movies You Might Have Missed***
(And Some You Will Be Glad You Did)!

On DVD






How To Be A Latin Lover (2017)


An aging gigolo finds himself out on the street when his much older wife of 25 years swaps him out for yet a younger gigolo.

Though young Maximo was raised on the maxim, "You get what you work for, not what you wish for," he doesn't buy it, especially when his father is killed while working hard on the job.  That just proved to Maximo that working hard doesn't get you anywhere, so he decides finding a rich wife is the way to go.  He is a young attractive man and has no trouble finding an older woman willing to lavish him with a life of luxury. 

Be careful what you wish for.

Twenty-five years later, Maximo (Eugenio Durbez) is married to Peggy (Renee Taylor), his much older wife.  He drives expensive cars and doesn't have to do much except make Peggy happy.  He gets around the house on a hover board  and basically his day consists of hanging out by the pool and driving his hot car. 

But when Maximo's wife is attracted to a younger man, Maximo, who was never trained to do anything except be taken care of by a rich wife, is forced to give up his luxurious life.  He is out on the street with nowhere to go and no way to make any money.  He asks his friend, Rick (Rob Lowe), another kept man, to take him in, but Rick tells him that since he and Millicent (Linda Lavin) have sex in every room, the only accommodation he has is Millicent's granddaughter's playhouse out back. Everything is doll-sized and pink.  

When that doesn't work, Maximo is forced to make contact with his estranged sister, Sara (Salma Hayek) and ask her to take him in. Sara is an aspiring architect, and a single Mom with a little boy, Hugo (Raphael Alejandro).  Maximo is an out-of-work gigolo who is inappropriate and out of touch.  So a clash of lifestyles ensues - hard-working Sara with a young son vs. jaded gigolo who has no concept of the real world and has never held a job.  

When Maximo arrives at Sara's apartment and she frets about where he will sleep, Maximo asks "Can't I sleep upstairs?" to which Sara replies, "Upstairs?  Those are other peoples' apartments!" Like I said, Maximo doesn't have a clue about real life.

What is Maximo to do?  

He is no longer the young hunk who can attract any woman, and he doesn't know how to survive on his own. What was once easy for Maximo when he was young and handsome is now not so easy.  Rick tells him that the two of them are survivors and they need to do whatever they have to do to survive.

Then a light bulb goes off for Maximo.

Hugo goes to an expensive private school on scholarship and when Maximo takes Hugo to school he smells money and sets his sights on Celeste (Raquel Welch), who it just so happens is the grandmother of Hugo's love interest, Arden (McKenna Grace, another child actor that I didn't hate in this, though I didn't really like her in "Gifted"). Maximo decides to use Hugo's interest in Arden to get to Celeste in some funny scenes where Maximo teaches young Hugo the art of seduction.

So Maximo hatches a plan to attract Celeste.  He knows to attract money he has to look like he has some so he gets a make-over, buys expensive clothes and basically maxes himself out to get his latin lover mojo back. 

But will what worked 25 years ago work now?

Rob Lowe and Linda Lavin are very funny as the role-playing couple, Rick and Millicent.  Millicent is insatiable and Rick really has to earn his gigolo dollars.  One scene where he plays a pizza delivery guy delivering pizza to Millicent is hilarious.  Rob, who himself started out as a young hunky actor, has now made a career as a comic actor and basically making fun of himself. Nice to see a handsome guy who doesn't take himself seriously.

This is a funny premise and there are lots of laughs to be had mostly because of Durbez who is so charmingly bad - but in a good way.  This is his film and he makes the most of it. However, I also loved seeing the older actresses - Welch, Lavin and Taylor - getting parts again, though I have never seen so much Spanx in my life.

I have a lot of respect for Salma Hayek.  Though she can pick and choose pretty much whatever vehicles she wants (she is married to a billionaire), she chooses to honor her heritage and promotes Spanish language films and films with Latin American themes and characters.  She is also a strong woman who produces and stars in her own films, promotes women's roles and doesn't mind lending her name and presence to the film, even if her part is not the lead.  She brought Frida Kahlo (unibrow and all) to life and who makes serious movies about artists anymore? And here she has also honored our legendary older actresses and given roles to women of a certain age - Raquel Welch, Renee Taylor and Linda Lavin.

Written by Chris Spain and Jon Zack and directed by Ken Marino, there are laughs to be had here even though the film devolved into ridiculousness at the end, but I forgive it because it was cute and funny for most of the film.  And what's not to like.  Weird Al even had a cameo.

Rosy the Reviewer says...one of the better comedies of the year.





My Cousin Rachel (2017)




Believing that his beloved cousin's new wife might have had something to do with his cousin's death, a young Englishman plots revenge against her but instead falls under her spell. 

I am generally down on remakes when the first film was perfectly fine.  I mostly apply that to foreign films, but it could be said for remaking old classics as well.  The original of this film was made in 1952 and starred Olivia De Havilland and Richard Burton.  You couldn't get much better than that, right?  Well, I have to eat my words to a certain extent.  This one was really good, and since I am also partial to good stories and good storytelling, this remake is worth seeing.  Plus it's in color and new technology allows this film to do things that the original couldn't.

In case you missed the first one or didn't read the book by Daphne Du Maurier, Philip (Sam Claflin, who played Finnick Odair in "The Hunger Games" series and more recently, the love interest in "Me Before You") was an orphan raised by his older cousin, Ambrose.  While Philip was attending college, Ambrose had taken ill and gone off to Florence to recover.  He wrote to Philip and told him that while there he had met another cousin, their cousin, Rachel (Rachel Weisz), whom he married.  Philip found this very unsettling that Ambrose would marry so late in life as he had not shown any interest in women before. 

As more letters arrived, Ambrose's letters took on an ominous tone.  He complained of Rachel controlling him and that Rachel had become "his torment."  He begged Philip to come and rescue him, but when Philip arrived in Florence, he found only an empty villa and Enrico Rainaldi (Pierfrancesco Favino), Rachel's lawyer who told him that Ambrose was dead, Rachel had left and he didn't know where she had gone. Rainaldi tells Philip that Ambrose had a brain tumor that affected his behavior.

Philip returns to the estate where he shared his happy childhood with Ambrose, and since Ambrose left everything to him, Philip is now the master of the estate and will inherit everything when he turns 25.  It isn't long before Rachel asks to come and visit Philip, and though he says yes, he has a major chip on his shoulder about Rachel even before he meets her.

Poor Philip. It would have been much easier to hate her if she had been unattractive, but of course, Rachel is beautiful.  And as it turns out, Rachel is not only beautiful, she is considerate and charming.  Even the dogs like her.  And our guy is a handsome, red-blooded young man so it's not long before Philip is in Rachel's thrall. He asks his godfather to increase Rachel's allowance even though his godfather tells him her reputation is not good - has something to do with her having some sort of insatiable appetite.  Mmmm.  Now they couldn't have said THAT in the 1952 version!

However, it isn't long before cracks start appearing and Philip's godfather tells him he thinks Rachel is sending money overseas.  She is also continually making Philip cups of her "special tea."  Now that wouldn't be such a big deal except Philip also starts experiencing strange symptoms and feeling ill.

As more strange events occur, Philip becomes more and more suspicious but Rachel is always able to explain everything away, and he is just so besotted he believes her.  He is also so besotted that he decides that when he becomes of age at 25 and his inheritance kicks in, he is going to give her everything. And that is very soon.

Ominous music plays throughout and there is this one scene when Rachel and Philip hug and her hand goes around his neck in a sort of claw so now, despite the fact that Rachel seems to be a loving and charming woman, we have to wonder about Rachel as well. 

Should Philip believe his cousin Ambrose's letters as he struggled with his illness?  Did Rachel have something to do with his death? Or was it a brain tumor that affected his mind and Rachel is innocent?

A series of events occur and Philip makes some assumptions that lead to a tragic end.

Directed and adapted by Roger Michell from the classic book, this is a great gothic story and a showcase for Weisz and Clafill, both attractive and talented actors. Believe it or not, I first noticed Rachel Weisz in the 1999 version of "The Mummy," and she has had a solid career and a Best Actress Oscar and Golden Globe ("The Constant Gardener"), but for some reason, she is undeservedly still not a household name.  Perhaps she shuns superstardom to play supporting roles in smaller indie movies she believes in, like "The Lobster," which I loved.

I also have to give props to Holliday Grainger, an actress to watch out for.  She is lovely here and was one of the best things about the recent film "Tulip Fever." Plus, I love her name!

Rosy the Reviewer says...sometimes there are stories worth retelling.  This is one of them.





***My 1001 Movies I Must See Before I Die Project***







184 to go!

Have YOU seen this classic film?





Delicatessen (1991)


A post-apocalyptic black comedy about a clown who moves into an apartment over a delicatessen and falls for the butcher's daughter unaware that the butcher is serving up some "unsavory" meats. 

Actually, the ex-clown is lured to the apartment by Clapet, the butcher (Jean-Claude Dreyfus) through an ad in the paper for a maintenance man. You see, it's post- apocalyptic France and food is in short supply.  It's in such short supply that the people have to use grain for money, and the butcher, whose deli is on the ground floor of an apartment building that he also owns, is luring people to his deli with the promise of job opportunities only to murder them, cut them up and sell their flesh as meat to his tenants.

Unemployed circus clown Louison (Dominique Pinon) is the next targeted victim, hired by Clapet to do routine maintenance at the apartment building.  While there he befriends Clapet's daughter, Julie (Marie-Laure Dougnac), and they fall in love. He is a good worker, so Clapet decides to keep him around for awhile and as Louison interacts with the various odd tenants of the apartment building, they like him too.  However, Julie becomes aware of what her father is doing and decides to ask for help from the Troglodistes, a mysterious and feared vegetarian group who live in the sewers.

The Troglodistes attack but are repelled and despite the fact that the tenants like Louison, the desire for meat is too strong so Clapet and his tenants decide Louison's time has come and Julie and Louison must fight for their lives.

Now if any of that sounds funny to you or you enjoy films about cannibalism, you might like this film. I have actually been known to enjoy such films. I quite enjoyed "Eating Raoul" and "The Cook, The Thief, The Wife & Her Lover," but this film lacked the sophistication of those two and the story was just too out there.  Plus the humor was very slapstick, which is not surprising when you consider that the French worshiped Jerry Lewis, the king of slapstick and physical humor. I don't like slapstick humor.

The real star of this film is the cinematography and camerawork.  There are lots of super close-ups and shots from below and a moody, foggy look to the film similar to some of the Coen Brothers' films.  But that is where the similarity ends.

I watched the film on Netflix and Netflix gave it only one and a half stars.  So the critics in the "1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die" book think this is one of the greatest 1001 movies ever made but looks like most of us regular folks who have watched it think otherwise. I thought it barely deserved those one and a half stars.

Why it's a Must See: "Creatively combining genres -- post-apocalyptic, sci-fi, black comedy, and sweet romance -- and offering audiences an impressively oddball collection of sounds, colors, actors, and images, [directors] Jean-Pierre Jeunet and Marc Caro's inspired film...was the recipient of several European awards and anticipated the pair's subsequent collaboration, The City of Lost Children (1995). Jeunet would go on to direct Alien Resurrection in 1997, which was followed by the international blockbuster Amelie in 2001."
---"1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die"

Rosy the Reviewer says...oddball is right. It was so oddball I found it unwatchable.
(In French with English subtitles)





***The Book of the Week***




The Smitten Kitchen Cookbook: Recipes and Wisdom from an Obsessive Home Cook by Deb Perelman (2012)


Award-winning blogger Perelman (www.smittenkitchen.com) shares her favorite recipes in her first cookbook.

Perelman was never a chef, never a restaurant owner.  She never even worked in a restaurant.  She was just a home cook cooking in a tiny New York City apartment kitchen who wanted to cook really delicious food and she wanted it to be fun.

Early on she was overwhelmed by the number of recipes out there in the world.  When confronted with all of the choices on the Internet alone, she wondered how do you pick the best recipe?

I can attest to this dilemma.  I love cooking but even more than that I love READING recipes and reading about cooking.  I subscribe to several magazines that are full of recipes and I have tons of cookbooks.  I have folders and folders of recipes I have ripped out of said magazines.  Am I really going to be able to actually try all of those recipes?

Perelman founded her blog Smitten Kitchen as a way to not only wade through all of the recipes out there so that you and I can avoid making a bad recipe but she also wants cooking to be fun and the result to be delicious.

"I never set out to build a website that would draw more than five million visitors a month...The reality of what drives me into the kitchen...is something far less bragworthy: I am picky as hell...and also, a little obsessive."

She goes on to tell you about an experience in a restaurant where she found the chicken less than wonderful so she went home and worked on it again and again until it WAS wonderful.  And instead of you having to go through all kinds of recipes to find the one that works and is delicious, she has done it for you and shares them here in this delightful cookbook.

I mean, who wouldn't want the best version of French toast or meat loaf or lemon bars?

Perelman includes opinionated homespun, fun-to-read commentary and pulls no punches.

Here's a, er, taste:

"Maple Bacon Biscuits"

"A whole big lot of the time, recipes come from disappointment, from something I'd ordered out somewhere, imagining it would taste one way, when really it tasted another way. (and not a good way)...It's hardly the most honorable of inspirations -- being convinced that everyone else is doing it wrong, that I alone can do things well...But it did produce a fine biscuit...The results of my complaints are sweet but salty, buttery and bacony and as light as can be.  You should probably serve them alongside eggs, but they have a tendency not to last long enough for you to scramble some."

"Iceberg Stack with Blue Cheese and Radishes"

"You can't eat as many iceberg wedges as I have without forming an opinion or two about them, and what some places get right, most get very wrong.  The first is bottled dressing.  Do you know how easy it is to make blue cheese dressing?  Seriously, just skip ahead to the recipe for a second, did you see that?"

OK:

  • 1/2 c. well-shaken buttermilk
  • 1/2 c. mayonnaise
  • 1 T. freshly squeezed lemon juice
  • 1/2 t. Worcestershire sauce
  • 1 small garlic clove, minced
  • 1/4 t. table salt
  • 1/8 t. freshly ground pepper
(In a medium bowl, whisk together...until smooth.  Adjust seasonings to taste)

And I do see...looks very easy and I am going to try it.

Her directions are detailed, easy to follow, and yes, opinionated.

There are breakfast recipes, recipes for salads, sandwiches, tarts, pizzas, seafood, poultry, meat, sweets and party snacks as well as an entire chapter devoted to vegetarian cooking and the whole book is beautifully illustrated and fun to read.

Rosy the Reviewer says...whether you like to cook or just read, this cookbook is a delight!

Thanks for reading!


  

See you next Friday 



for my review of  



"American Made"  


and


The Week in Reviews

(What to See or Read and What to Avoid)


 and the latest on



"My 1001 Movies I Must See Before 

 I Die Project."

  

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Check your local library for DVDs and books mentioned.
Next time you are wondering whether or not to watch a particular film, check out my reviews on IMDB (The International Movie Database). 









Tuesday, September 12, 2017

Fashion Inspiration for the Woman of a Certain Age (and Size)!



If you have read my blog over the years, you know that I love fashion, and despite being a woman of a certain age (and size), I still like to dress up.  I have also always enjoyed fashion magazines, ever since I found my older sister's stash of "Seventeen," way back when I was about eight. Since I love clothes and like to make a fashion statement, I always found fashion magazines inspirational. 

However, now that I am a woman of a certain age, I still enjoy them, but find that more and more, they relate less and less to women like me. It seems as we age, we become invisible, not just to the opposite sex and in fashion magazines, but to the world in general. 

So now, I still like to read fashion magazines and books not so much for the fashion inspiration I once sought but so that I can become outraged at the expectations laid out for us older women ("What Rosy Loves and a Rant About Fashion Magazines.")  Not only are we faced with 18-year-old size zero women, we are told what we should and shouldn't wear, what's out and what's in.  Because of that, it's easy to just say, "Screw it!" and give up on ourselves.  If the expectations are so great and yet nobody sees us and nobody else cares what we look like, why should we?

But we should.  We need to fight invisibility and make strong statements about the fact that we may be old but we are still alive and kicking, we still care about how we look and we look GREAT!

I recently posted "Make-Up 101 for the Woman of a Certain Age," in hopes that I could inspire the more mature woman not to give up on herself just because she is, uh, mature and a bit wrinkly.  I also wrote that post because I think we women should fight invisibility by slapping on a little color and not giving in to the ravages of old age.

So I am going to continue that theme, but this time, regarding fashion, in hopes that, despite a little extra poundage and a bit of thickness around the middle, we women of a certain age and size can still look good.  Especially if you are retired, I know it's tempting to just let it all hang out, wear sweatpants and old lady shoes because they are comfortable.  When you have put on weight, one of the first things to go is a waistband, but in the immortal words of Billy Crystal as actor Fernando Lamas on SNL  "It's better to look good than to feel good."

Actually, I am just kidding, well, sort of kidding.

I don't want you to be uncomfortable, but I also don't want you to give in to comfort to the point of not giving a damn what you look like or to think that because you weigh 20 pounds more than you should why bother to dress up?

I had fun awhile back writing a blog post called "Parisian Chic (it's one of my most popular posts, too!) where I reviewed all of those books that came out a few years ago extolling the virtues of being French.  You know the ones I mean, "French Women Don't Get Fat," etc., books meant to make us American women feel shlumpy and lazy.  We may not be French and we many not know 20 different ways to tie a scarf, but we are not shlumpy and we are not lazy.

As I said, though I am a mature woman, I still enjoy dressing up and reading about fashion, so if you, too, are interested in this kind of thing and feel like we women of a certain age and size are left out of the fashion party, I thought I would check out a few recent books on fashion to see if there are any tips that would not only make us less invisible but help us feel really good about ourselves, despite our age and size.  I am also going to see if these are inspirational, and if so, glean the best, share what I have learned and save you the trouble of having to wade through all of them yourselves.

And you are very welcome!

Oh, and I will throw in a few pictures of outfits I have thrown together too.




How To Get Dressed: A Costume Designer's Secrets For Making Your Clothes Look, Fit and Feel Amazing by Alison Freer (2015)


The title of this book is a bit misleading. It's not actually how to put on your clothes but rather how to take care of your clothes so that when you put them on you look amazing.

According to Freer, fit is the true enemy of great style and we need to get a tailor! 

"For example, for us curvy girls...

"Buying bigger and then taking in only where needed is the costume designer's ultimate secret weapon for dressing curves..."

You see, basically this whole book is about either tailoring your clothes yourself or getting it done.  I see lots and lots of dollars flying out of my bank account.

But she also talks about figuring out your own signature style, which I think is good.  Well, I thought it was good until she interviewed women in various professions and, wouldn't you know, one of them was a librarian...I had to say, "Oh no she didn't...

As you know, I am a retired librarian and have been fighting the librarian stereotype and the "you don't look like a librarian" comments all of my life.  Not sure what a librarian is supposed to look like, but I know what the stereotype is.  It's either an old fussy lady with a bun, glasses and double-tread floor gripper shoes or a buttoned up younger woman (yes, she still has glasses and a bun), who hides the dirty books under her desk and is just waiting for a man to come along so she can shake out her hair, take off her glasses, reveal how hot she is so that said man can ravage her on her desk.

So you can image what I thought of THIS then when a young librarian was interviewed about her personal style!

She was a twenty-five-year-old librarian and she had come up with "Librarian Noir" as her personal style.  Now I know she is making a statement about books with the noir part but when I read the blurb I had to cringe. 

Anyway, here is what our little librarian said:

"I run the library at my local university, so proper bookish styles have always been the cornerstone of my personal style.  But the older I get, the more I find myself wanting to break out of the classic 'librarian' mold.  I still need to look professional -- I'm just looking to add a bit of zip to my existing work clothes.  After writing down all the books and films I love, I realized that what I really wanted was to add a little classic Hollywood sex appeal to my wardrobe.  That's how I ended up with 'Librarian Noir.' I've plugged a few fluffy angora sweaters and seamed stockings into my existing closet of pencil skirts and ballet flats.  The result is a look that signals to the world that I'm a very proper lady--with a few secrets hidden just beneath the surface, should one want to scratch."

If ever there was a librarian stereotype, this is it. 

Librarian plus angora sweater and seamed stockings?  "A few secrets hidden beneath the surface?"  And scratch what?  Every man's fantasy, giving her a scratch and waking up that poor sex-starved librarian and finding out she's a sexual hellcat?

I also take issue with her talking about "bookish styles" - not sure what those are.  Likewise, don't know what the "classic librarian mold" is other than more stereotypes (reading glasses on a chain, pencil in bun, matching sweater set?)

(**As you can see, I feel strongly about the "librarian stereotype."  I actually wrote a whole blog post about it a couple of years ago called "Librarian Fashion. Others must care about it too, because that blog post has turned out to be one of my most popular ones. If you are interested, take a look).

After Freers finished discussing the importance of our finding our signature style, and I got over all of that librarian noir nonsense, she went on to list:

"Dumb Fashion Rules That Were Made for Breaking" which I mostly agreed with:

  • Be afraid of stripes
  • Don't wear white after Labor Day
  • Don't mix your metals
  • Don't wear leggings as pants
  • Don't wear boots in the summer
  • Don't mix patterns
  • Don't double up on denim

I agree that all of those are dumb rules except I think NOT doubling up on denim is a GOOD rule unless you want to look like you are just off the farm, and if leggings should be worn as pants, somebody should tell United Airlines.

Freers also offers some fun and strange tips that supposedly come from Hollywood actresses she has worked with: spraying your feet with cooking spray makes it easy to fit into stilettos - ladies, are we still wearing stilettos? - and "irons in a can (also known as wrinkle releasing sprays)" can work in a pinch.  Likewise, when it comes to our intimate wear, she says don't waste your money on expensive shape wear when granny panties and cotton bike shorts work just as well.  Good to know.  I've been wearing granny panties for years.

There is a chapter on shopping vintage and thrift and even one for the guys, but mostly this book is about clothes maintenance - stain removal, storage, shoe care and how to wash fabric the right way Yawn.

Rosy the Reviewer says...Inspiring for us women of a certain age and size?  Not really.  Some handy tips if you want to get into tailoring your clothes and need some advice on stain removal and greasing your stilettos, but this all sounds like too much work for me.  But at least all age groups and sizes can relate, though I'm still reeling from that 25-year-old librarian and her "Librarian noir."




This is what a librarian looks like!



How To Look Expensive: A Beauty Editor's Secrets to Getting Gorgeous Without Breaking the Bank by Andrea Pomerantz Lustig (2012)


No this book is not about how to look like a high priced hooker.

The title seems like it should be the title of a movie about high class call girls, but it's not.  In fact, Lustig takes issue with looking loud or tarty.

"Looking expensive is about looking chic and understated, polished and professional...It's about not being flashy or a show-off or a showgirl...It's luxe, not loud.  More Paris France than Paris Hilton."  Ouch.

This is yet another book revealing fashion secrets.  Who knew there were so many secrets about fashion out there and why are they secrets?  But in fact, rather than revealing secrets, this is more like a pep talk to not let yourself go.

"When you upgrade your look you are setting yourself up to upgrade your life."

"Improving your looks is a way to improve your life."

"Feeling like a million bucks makes you look like a million bucks."

You get the idea.

Lustig comes up with four styles to emulate to look expensive:

  • Park Avenue Pretty
  • Think Kate Middleton or Gwyneth Paltrow

  • Hollywood Boho
  • Think Taylor Swift or Chloe Sevigny

  • Glam Globe Trotter
  • Angelina Jolie or Sienna Miller

  • Modern Movie Star
  • Sandra Bullock or Jennifer Lopez


She also goes into make-up essentials, the top eyebrow mistakes. wardrobe rules and more pronouncements:

  • Less is always more
  • Build an edited beauty collection (check out my Make-up 101 blog mentioned above)
  • Knowledge is priceless - DIY or know how to not get overcharged
  • You can't put a price on good taste
  • Maintenance is everything
  • Buying new beauty products is a lot cheaper than buying new clothes
  • The key to a look that reads high worth is to enhance what you've got without trying to be someone else (then why did she list those stars)?

Rosy the Reviewer says...if you feel like a pep talk will get your butt off the couch and motivate you to put on some make-up and try to look like Jennifer Lopez, then this book might be for you but I found it a bit smug.



I am channeling my inner Jennifer Lopez!

 

 






Parisian Chic Look Book: What Should I Wear Today? by Ines de la Fressange and Sophie Gachet (2017)



You cannot escape the French and their superior attitude about fashion and not getting fat.

According to them, you should wear a lot of denim and a lot of black.

Through a series of pictures, the authors show you how you should dress for various events from going to work,



going out to dinner



and what to wear to visit the Eiffel Tower.

Huh?  There's a particular way we are supposed to dress to see the Eiffel Tower?

There is also a list of fashion faux pas, because, well, like I said these authors are French.

Not sure why Bermuda shorts with pockets are bad.  I am thinking Bermuda shorts in general are bad.  The authors also don't like leggings, knockoff bags, platform sneakers, culottes, long down jackets, head-to-toe fur, crepe-soled shoes, Crocs, bras with clear straps, piling on jewelry, cat T-shirts, Mom jeans, and more.  I mostly agree though I have to say the last time I was in Paris everyone looked like the Michelin Man in their long down jackets and I have to admit I am prone to piling on a bit of jewelry.



They end the book with what you SHOULD do - "Fashionable Style Tricks" such as pairing a straw bag with an evening dress, cinching your blazer with two belts, turning your V-neck backwards and using a pearl necklace as a belt.

Two belts? And they think culottes are a fashion faux pas?

The book is nicely illustrated with full outfits for many occasions but the models are all young, skinny bitches wearing nothing but black and denim.

Rosy the Reviewer says... If you can get past the skinny bitches and you like black and denim, you might find some inspiration here but once again, it's those damn French women trying to make us Americans feel fat and frumpy!



Gee, I wonder what they would say about an old lady in bell bottoms! 
 
At least I am wearing black!


 
 







The Power of Style: Everything You Need to Know Before You Get Dressed Tomorrow by Bobbie Thomas (2013)


Another fashion pep talk.

What's with these pep talks?  Are all women giving up on themselves that they need pep talks to get dressed?  I'd better read this book fast since tomorrow will be here before I know it!

Before you can even get dressed you have to go through these steps!


  • Step 1 - See yourself and ask Who Are You?

  • Step 2 - Act the part - body language and first impressions

  • Step 3 - Brand yourself

  • Step 4 - Know your worth

  • Step 5 - Put a plan in practice

OK, Rosy who are you?  I am an old gal packing a few extra pounds who just wants to be able to get dressed tomorrow and look presentable without having to ask myself "Who Am I?"  All of that just to get dressed each day?


She then goes into colors (do we still do that? - I'm summer, by the way) and finding out the best styles for your body type but for one thing - who does colors anymore and the whole body type thing has been debunked.  We curvy girls CAN wear skinny jeans.

This book is less about fashion and more of a pep talk but reading 111 pages of pep talk would keep me from getting dressed by tomorrow.

Rosy the Reviewer says...if I have to do all of that before I get dressed tomorrow, I would never get dressed!



I just threw this together!




The Capsule Wardrobe: 1,000 Outfits from 30 Pieces by Wendy Mak (2017)


Here is the formula: 80/20.  80% basics and 20% stuff you actually like. 

Literally 109 pages putting those 30 pieces together into outfits. Mak shows you how to take 30 pieces and turn them into 1000 outfits but I have to ask, Why?Yawn.  What fun is it to wear the same 30 pieces all of the time even if they are in all different combinations?

Rosy the Reviewer says... I don't think I am a good candidate for the capsule wardrobe.  In jackets alone, I have more than 30 pieces and I like the idea of being able to shop my wardrobe.  I don't think I'm a capsule wardrobe person.



After all is said and done, here is what I have to say about fashion for the woman of a certain age and size:

DO WHATEVER THE HELL YOU WANT!!!

Read fashion magazines if you want.  Read books about fashion if you want.  Both will give you some ideas but don't let those skinny bitches tell you what you can and cannot wear because the bottom line is - WEAR WHATEVER THE HELL YOU WANT!

It's your life.  Enjoy it!

EXPRESS YOURSELF!



 
Thanks for reading!

See you Friday 


for my review of  

"It"  


and


 
The Week in Reviews

(What to See or Read and What to Avoid)


 and the latest on



"My 1001 Movies I Must See Before 

 I Die Project."

  

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