Tuesday, March 1, 2016

All Day and All Night at the Oscars: My Academy Award Wrap-Up 2016

Sigh.  It was a long day and a long night but...

I won!


No, not an Oscar, but I did win the family Oscar competition this year, the third year in a row.  I chose 19 out of the 24 winners correctly, though that was one less than last year (It's easy to get tripped up by the Best Documentary Short and the Best Animated Short categories, since who actually sees those)?  Also I was sentimental about Stallone.  I wanted him to win even though the writing was on the wall for Mark Rylance.

Hubby and I were neck and neck for much of the competition, but I held firm that "Spotlight" would win Best Picture, which it did, despite everyone else believing "The Revenant" would win.  In fact, Hubby was so confident, he looked over at me and smugly said, "How can 'Spotlight' possibly win?  It has only won one Oscar tonight." Well, we all know how that turned out, don't we Hubby?

As you know, I called "Spotlight" as Best Picture back in December (read my review), well before it was even nominated. Though I recognize what it took to make "The Revenant," it was not an enjoyable or inspiring film for me, whereas "Spotlight" was. I felt there were folks in the Academy who would feel the same as I and they did and apparently they did.  This is the third film I knew would win Best Picture way before the nominations were even made, so "Spotlight" joins "The Hurt Locker" and "Argo" in my "I knew it! arsenal.  

I bring all of this up so that you will know that Rosy the Reviewer has true movie cred.  You can trust me!

That said, the Oscar Ceremony is Super Bowl Sunday for movie lovers and it doesn't just include the ceremony itself.  If you are really committed, you need to start at 2:30 when the E! Channel starts interviewing celebs as they start arriving onto The Red Carpet.  However, if you do that, it can certainly feel like you are spending all day and all night at the Oscars. If you really want to make the commitment, you can start even earlier, but I don't recommend it.  The really early arrivals on the Red Carpet are people you don't care about and the interviewers don't really have much to do except talk about what they THINK people are going to wear or what they THINK is going to happen.  (Snore).

Something new this year - little "Fun Facts" about the presenters under them on the screen as they introduced the awards.  What did you think of that?

 
 
So Without Further Ado,
Here is my Oscar Wrap-up.
(I watched the whole thing so you didn't have to).



The Red Carpet


Fun Fact:  The Red Carpet is 500 feet long and 33 feet wide.  Your life just wouldn't have been complete if you didn't know that, right?  Thank you, Ryan Seacrest.

If you are really a rabid fan (I confess!), you start the festivities early and watch the Red Carpet interviews.  My daughter and I used to have fun dishing about all of the dresses, especially when people made poor choices, but these days it's not as much fun because all of these stars have stylists so nobody really messes up that much anymore. 

But there are a few things I can still rant about.

First of all, ladies, if you are wearing a strapless gown, and especially if your hair is pulled up or back, either wear big earrings or a necklace.  I don't recommend both but at least one of those.  Most of the actresses seem to like to wear strapless, hair pulled back and teeny-tiny little earrings and no necklace.  I do not approve.  Too much skin. 

And speaking of skin, I also do not approve of the plunging neckline, the one that goes down to the waist.  This is especially unfortunate when the woman wearing the gown is so skinny that she has no breasts and all we can see is bone.  It is also unfortunate when the woman wearing the gown has really big breasts and they spill out all over the place.  Either way, the dress doesn't work, so don't do it.

As I said, I used to have so much fun watching The Red Carpet with my daughter but since she is not available, here are the dresses I thought worked, as I dish all by myself:





Giuliana Rancic, thank you for wearing big earrings with this dress but, Giuliana, EAT SOMETHING! 

Fun Fact:  She actually says she DOES eat.








Rooney Mara in Givenchy. Who wouldn't look good in Givenchy?   I think she needs earrings.

Fun Fact: In my review for "Carol," I likened Mara to Audrey Hepburn.  Hepburn was a Givenchy muse. 


 





Cate Blanchett in Armani Prive.  I wasn't sure about this dress at first, but when Hubby, unprompted, woke up out of his stupor and said, "I really like that," I thought, "Huh?"  If, Mr-I-Don't-Care-About-Fashion pipes in, it must mean something.  It grew on me.

Fun Fact: Hubby usually has no taste.


 







Alicia Vikander who won in the Best Supporting Actress category for "The Danish Girl" in Louis Vuitton

Fun Fact:  Alicia and Michael Fassbender are a thing!

 
 






Jennifer Jason Leigh, nominated for Best Supporting Actress for "The Hateful Eight." Loved the dress but when interviewed she acted as if she had been partaking a wee bit too much at the open bar.

Fun Fact: This role is a comeback of sorts.  She was hot, hot, hot in the nineties and then she kind of disappeared.

 





Jennifer Garner - Take that, Ben!  But she needs a necklace!

Fun Fact:  Jen and Ben are divorced but he still lives on the property - in the guest house.

 



And let me give the guys some love...


Leo DiCaprio.

Leo looked fantastic, and deserved his Best Actor win, but I am not a fan of stubble, especially after what he looked like in "The Revenant" for the entire movie.  Shave, Leo, so we can see your pretty face.

Fun Fact: He is still not married.





Kevin Hart

Chris Rock had fun with Kevin.  Kevin is hot right now and Chris said, “Kevin makes movies fast. Every month. Porno stars don’t make movies that fast.”

Loved the bling.

Fun Fact: He is only 5'4," which is fodder for a lot of his humor.





And Chris Rock himself.

Fun Fact: It wasn't lost on viewers that he was wearing a WHITE tux!




And then there's me - note the big earrings and I have spared you the plunging neckline.

 


Loungewear chic! 

Fun Fact: That's not my real hair color.







Now here are the ones that did NOT wow The Red Carpet!





Saoirse Ronan - nominated for Best Actress for "Brooklyn."

Too skinny for her decollate.

Fun Fact:  She wore green to honor her home country of Ireland.



 




Julianne Moore.

She looked like something out of "50 Shades of Grey" with those bondage straps. 

Fun Fact:  Kendall Jenner modeled this dress on the runway.  That should have told Julianne something.  Kendall Jenner is 21; Julianne Moore is 56.

 






Heidi Klum in Marchesa

She has been making many fashion faux pas in recent years, which is ironic since she is the host of "Project Runway," where she judges designers on their clothes. This looks like someone tp'd her. 

Fun Fact: Heidi is 5'9".

 






Final observations from The Red Carpet

When little Jacob Tremblay was interviewed on The Red Carpet (he was the kid in "Room"), they showed this picture of his parents and him on their way to the Oscars.  Wow, no wonder this kid is cute - two of the most beautiful people I have ever seen.

Fun Fact:  The father is now trending on YouTube.  Not sure why Jacob's mother isn't.






Whoopie looked great.
She was wearing a dress, which was fun since she never, never wears a dress. It was fun seeing her all dolled up, but I guess it was so shocking to everyone that Whoopi was mistaken for Oprah. They wondered when Oprah got all of those tats!

Fun Fact: The dress was inspired by Bette Davis in "All About Eve." 
 
























Chris Rock's Monologue

Considering the brouhaha about the lack of diversity of the nominees going into the show, I thought Chris did a good job acknowledging the issue, but keeping it light but edgy.

"I am here at the Academy Awards, otherwise known as the "White People's Choice Awards."

He said he didn't recall other years when there was this kind of protest and certainly in other years there were nominees who were all white.  He mentioned the 50's and 60's and said, probably there were no protests against the Oscars, because black people had other more important things to consider such as lynchings- "hard to care about who will win Best Cinematographer when your grandma is hanging from a tree."

There were jabs at the protesters, Will and Jada Smith particularly.
"Jada boycotting the Oscars is like me boycotting Rihanna's panties. I wasn't invited."

He also said that the "In Memoriam" segment will be just black people who got shot by cops on their way to the movies.

He did a good job and was very funny, most of the time.



The Awards Ceremony

I know this year's Oscars were rife with controversy regarding the lack of diversity in the nominees, and I am not going to weigh in because everything that needs to be said has been, but I will say that the Academy had ample opportunity to nominate some stellar performances by black actors, one of whom was Abraham Attah, the child star of "Beasts of No Nation."  And you heard me right.  I know I rant about children getting Oscar nominations but this kid was phenomenal as was Idris Elba, who also was snubbed.

However, I will weigh in on some of the things I observed during the ceremony and give out some Rosy the Reviewer Awards.




***Award for the Dumbest Idea***

I had heard that all of the nominees had been asked to submit the names of people they wanted to thank so that those names could be listed while the winner talked, thus shortening the speeches and in the long run shortening the show.  Well, I noticed the crawl at the bottom of the screen when the winner was giving his or her speech.  What I did NOT notice was the speeches being any shorter and they still thanked people.  Dumb idea.  It didn't work.




***Most Memorable Speech Award***

People generally don't like their idols to have political views and to share them during their Oscar speeches, but Leo was able to make a potlical speech about global warming by starting the speech out with how hard it had been for them to find a place with snow to film "The Revenant."  He started with that and easily segued into his views on the necessity to take global warming seriously.  Very elegantly done.





***Most Moving Moment Award***

Lady Gaga performing her song "Till it Happens to You," from the film "The Hunting Ground," a film about rape on college campuses.  Unfortunately, the song did not win but it was a real moment.







***Funniest Moment Award***

The parody that wondered what the nominated films might have been like if black actors had been in them especially the one featuring Tracy Morgan as "The Danish Girl (he was eating a Danish)."



***The Who The Hell is Stacy Dash? Award for Least Funny***

Because no one knew who the hell Stacy Dash was.




***Booby Prizes for the Funny Bits that Were Supposed to be Funny...but Weren't***


# 1: Sarah Silverman introducing the nominated song from "Spectre" and going off on a rant about James Bond that I didn't understand at all.  Not sure that she did either.  They serve a lot of booze at these events.

#2: Three little kids of Asian descent came out carrying suitcases.  They were supposed to be the the accountants from PricewaterhouseCoopers, which tabulates the votes and Rock introduced them as Ming Zu, Bao Ling and David Moskowitz. The Asian community is up in arms for Rock perpetuating the stereotype that Asian kids are all good at math.  I also think they should be up in arms because even if it wasn't offensive, it just wasn't funny.

 
So that's another Oscar year gone by.
 
What did YOU think of the Oscars?

And don't forget to check my Friday reviews so you will know what is worth seeing.

You can trust me! 
 
I'm Rosy the Reviewer!
 
 
 
Thanks for Reading!
 
See you Friday

 
for my review of the new movie 

 
"The Witch"
 
and


 
The Week in Reviews

 
(What to See or Read and What to Avoid)

 

and the latest on
 
"My 1001 Movies I Must See Before
 I Die Project."

 
  


 
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4 comments :

  1. Well...since you mentioned me...

    COMPLETELY disagree with you on Rooney Mara's dress (which is HORRIBLE and also basically what she always wears!) and on Soairse Ronan's look, which I thought was lovely and very cool on her (and I generally agree with you on the plunging neckline, but I think her choice, the fit, and styling worked.) Cate Blanchett's dress was to-die, in my opinion -- one of my favorites (that color, too, is divine on her.) Jennifer Jason Leigh's is a bit meh for me. And yes, Heidi looked insane.

    Other opinions: Loved Olivia Munn's Stella McCartney, I actually thought Gaga's red carpet pantsuit was quite elegant while still being edgy enough to be very "her," I *loved* Naomi Watt's dress,

    Diane Krueger, whose style I usually loved, picked a batsh*t crazy dress. Olivia Wilde's dress was terrible. Brie Larson's wasn't terrible, but the whole thing didn't quite hold together for me (though I loved the color.)

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  2. Thank you for your comment, Ashley. I will have to politely disagree with you about Rooney's and Saoirse's dresses. As for Gaga, I liked the concept but the fit was terrible. Naomi was good and you were right about the rest. Olivia Wilde's dress was a perfect example of the too much skin and it was horribly unflattering. It needed a belt or something because she looked like a big box. Thank you for your comments. Always welcome...and I missed you at the Red Carpet!

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  3. So I watched but was running back and forth to the kitchen so missed some things. I was so-so on all the gowns...dunno why...but nothing hit me either way. However, Garner's dress really reminded me of the Madame X portrait by John Singer Sargent. What do you think?

    http://www.lynetteabel.org/madamex.jpg

    My all time fav dress and jewelry from the Oscars was Scarlett Johanssen last year in that crazy green dress with the statement necklace.

    I LOVE your outfit with the lovely kimono. Elegant.

    Glad Spotlight won Best Picture. I get tired of the huge special effects extravaganza movies so was pleased a good old fashioned movie that told an essential story won.

    This week I want to see the new Michael Moore movie before it leaves the theaters but for movie magic I need to find Bridge of Spies somewhere.

    Thought Chris Rock was good and better than Harris last year but it seems viewership was down. What's your thought about the drop in viewers?

    sazzy

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    Replies
    1. You are right about Garner's dress. And BTW Bridge of Spies is just out on DVD. I have it in my grubby little hands as we speak so will be watching it this week and reviewing it next week. I have Room too. Viewership down? Don't they say that every year? I think the Oscars really only pulls people who love movies. If you haven't seen the films, it doesn't really mean much. But not sure why. You would think with all of the controversy, viewership would have been up because people would want to see and hear what would happen. How was the Michael Moore film?

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