Retirement Brain

Have you ever been sitting in the living room at 4pm with a glass of wine watching "Ellen," and you look down and realize you are still wearing your nightgown and you haven't brushed your teeth yet today?

Have you been walking around smelling something you didn't like and realized it was you, because you have been to the gym the last couple of days but never showered?

If so, you are probably retired and "Retirement Brain" has taken over.

Do you remember that old ad about drugs, where a guy cracks an egg and as the egg boils and crackles, he says "This is your brain on drugs?"

Well, that's your brain on drugs

and this is your brain on retirement.

Kind of like that.

How do you know you have "Retirement Brain?"

• You rarely know what day it is or the date. 
• You walk into a room and immediately forget why you are there. 
• You recognize the face but the name just won't come - until about three hours later in the middle of the night. 
• Some days your hair looks so bad you can't even call it a "rat's nest," because the rat doesn't even want to hang out in there. 
• You can't imagine being anywhere before 11am or going to bed before midnight. 
• It's Tuesday and you don't realize you have been wearing the same shirt for three days until you notice a piece of pepperoni from the pizza you had for dinner on Saturday night stuck to the front.
• Sometimes you forget to put on underwear.
• You keep looking for your favorite work out clothes and discover they have been in the dryer for a week.
• You really enjoy the four-hour "Sister Wives" marathon while eating a pint of Ben & Jerry's Cherry Garcia ice cream.  You almost start on the Mint Chocolate Cookie until you realize you will need it for the "Naked and Afraid" marathon.
• You find yourself proudly wearing unusual outfits.

(That big fat part around the bottom of that coat is faux fur. The other fat parts are me! I look like I am wearing an upside-down English Beefeater's Bearskin hat) !

• You get great joy dressing up your dogs (but come to think of it, I have always done that)!

(This is my version of Miss Havisham from Dickens' "Great Expectations.")

• You find yourself trying to explain the finer points of Vicki's and Tamra's argument about Brooks' cancer treatment to Hubby during Happy Hour (some of you will get this one and some of you won't - consider yourself lucky if you are in the latter group)

• Your idea of a perfect day is doing nothing.

If you have nodded your head "yes" to at least five of these (or some variation of these), you are in the throes of "Retirement Brain."

 

Just what IS "Retirement Brain?"

 "Retirement Brain" is a slow-onset condition that usually kicks in about six months into retirement.  This is because the first six months of retirement you are in shock and keep getting up in the morning expecting to go to work.  You wander around the house looking for people to help and keep recommending books to your husband (I was a librarian).

But when you finally realize those days are over, "Retirement Brain" kicks in.

But my fellow retirees and those who love you, don't despair. Even though you are acting unlike yourself and your brain feels like a huge vacant airplane hangar, there is a reason for "Retirement Brain."

"Retirement Brain" kicks in to relieve your brain of all of that junk you had to put up with for the last 40 years - people complaining, people whining, problems, questions, tasks you weren't really feeling, bosses who bossed, employees who slacked, people who annoyed, worries you had about dealing with all of that. Yes, you were a competent, efficient, interesting, productive person all of those years.  So why are you suddenly staring off into space or watching YouTube videos of kittens and wondering what the hell is going on?

Don't worry.  "Retirement Brain" has a plan.  The plan is to clear all of that old stuff out, all of that stuff you didn't want to do, all of those worries you didn't want to have, so that now you can fill that vast void with what YOU want to fill it with.

It could be all sorts of things: saving the world, moving to Europe, giving a damn, getting a new job (well maybe not that), shopping excursions, meaningful volunteering, trips with your kids and grandkids, finding true meaning in your life.

  

The point is that "Retirement Brain," though it seems to disconnect you from the "real world," is actually connecting you to YOUR real world, the real world of what you really, really want to put your mind to NOW. The Real You.  It could be getting caught up with all of those TV dramas you missed over the years.  It could be finding the perfect restaurant. It could be reading the classics. It could be losing 50 pounds or it could be eating whatever the hell you want.  And it could just be finding yourself for the first time and really, really enjoying life.

That's the point. "Retirement Brain" is now allowing you to be your true self...before it's too late.

You might have spent your working years doing something you enjoyed.  Good for you.  Most of us can find something positive and rewarding in what we did or we wouldn't have done it.  But that's not the point.  Most of us, whether we enjoyed it or not, HAD to do what we did.

But now "Retirement Brain" is telling you that you don't have to do anything you don't want to do anymore.  So if you don't want to remember what day it is or you forget to brush your teeth, so what?  Your old brain has left the building and "Retirement Brain" has taken over and "Retirement Brain" says, let it all hang out!

That might be uncomfortable for some.

Don't despair.  "Retirement Brain" knows what it's doing.

If you have been working since you were 15, then it will probably take you about 15 months to actually enjoy retirement.  "Retirement Brain" is there to allow you some relief from feeling guilty about not making money anymore or having a real job or forgetting to shower.  Soon, "Retirement Brain" will clear out the cobwebs and will start a new mind set that will give you joy (See "The Joy of Retirement") and a new, meaningful outlook on life.

You have another 20 years (at least) to live your true life.  Do not fear "Retirement Brain."

"Retirement Brain" wants you to be happy.

And "New-You Brain" is on its way!

Thanks for Reading!

See you Friday

for my review of the new movie 

"Beasts of No Nation" 

and

The Week in Reviews

(What to See or Read and What to Avoid)

and the latest on

My 1001 Movies I Must See Before

 I Die Project."

  

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Passing the Baton

My daughter graduated from library school in June.  I retired from my 40 year career as a librarian in July.

Just as I left the profession, my daughter began job hunting for her first professional library position.

She just called to say she had accepted a very good job offer.

I am so proud of her and happy that she has chosen the profession that sustained me for 40 years.

My daughter's and my lives have had many parallels, 37 years apart. 

We both moved thousands of miles away from our families, we both wanted to be actresses and we both became librarians.

We were born

"Welcome to the world!"

      1948                                                                                  1985                                                                                                     

                                                                        


        

 

 

 

 

We grew up in loving families.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

We Graduated from High School

 

                 1966                                                                                                        2003                                                                                                                                                                                                      

                                                               

We Graduated from College

             1970

 

 

 

 

 

 2007

 

 

 

 

 

 

We Got Married

 

  




                                  1984                                                                    2010

                                                

 

 

We Were Actresses and Performers

                                                 

 

                                    

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Then we became librarians.

 

 

 

Welcome to the world of libraries!

 

 

 

 

               

     My first job -  1974                                                   Her first job - 2013

 

 

A picture is worth a thousand words!

 

 

 

 

My mother got a real kick out of my daughter. 

 

 

 

Once, when my mother was particularly complimentary about her, I said, "Just like me, huh, Mom?" 

 

To which she replied, "Yes, only better!" 

 

Mom!!!

 

But she was right.  Don't we wish our children to be better than we were, to do better than we did?

 

And now my daughter has parlayed her education and three years managing a retail store (while her husband finished up his Ph.D) into a library management position as her first job, something it took me three years into the profession to attain.

 

As the conductor of my own life, I have chosen to retire from the symphony I conducted for the last 40 years, pass my baton and bow to the next generation.

 

I know some of what lies ahead for her. May she enjoy it as I have.

 

Now I am on to my next symphony!

 

 

Have you passed your baton to someone?

 

 

 

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

 

 

 

See you Friday for a Thanksgiving Wrap-up!

 

                                          

                                                         Thanks for reading!

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